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I have been looking at my phone for the whole night. I dont know what my heart wants. I want to sms you but i am hoping that you will sms me first. I have been thinking again and again. Even if we really end up together, will we end up being a happy couple? Both of us have the tendency to keep those unhappy stuff to oneself. When i know that your are unhappy, i wish that u could tell me and share it with me. I am more upset when u rather not tell me...I dont know how to face u that's why i am avoiding u.
I just finished watching the hongkong drama. I really admire xiao bao. He is so passionate towards friends and relationship. Even if the girl that he like rejected him, he opts to stay beside her as her best friend. When she got herself a bf, he can only accept this cruel truth. Keep all the pain to himself. Yet, despite the sufferings, he is still devoted to the girl and helped her again ang again. If i am the girl, i will certainly fall in love with this guy... How i wish i can be as strong-willed and optimistic as him!!! How can i smile in front of you while treating like nothing has happened?
I wish that i am not left alone every moment. Coz when i am alone, i will start thinking. When i start thinking, u will be in my mind and those thinking tend to make me sad. I am not trying to imply that u should disappear right in front of me or i regret meeting u. I guess i am just pessimistic over our relationship. I really doubt that we will end up together. But i really hope that we can be together. You see...i am confused again!!! Dont ever try to leave out of my sight...u will break my heart!